When Love and Hate Collide
by koiishi tenshi
Summary: Iruka's fight with Mizuki looked at in a very different way. Shounen-ai. Character death. Violence.


A/N: Well, seeing as my imouto Pharaohess163 has been begging me to upload this... I wasn't intending to but she won... she always does ' I was watching the fight between Mizuki and Iruka in the bamboo grove and my muse, being the angst-loving btchy perv she is, saw more in Iruka's flashback than friendship. Thus this piece of angsty wonder was born. It's not by any means the best thing I've ever written, considering I wrote it in about an hour or two. It got a good reaction on AarinFantasy though, so I guess I'll risk it. Please, if you like it... review. BUT! NO FLAMES. I will say this now. THIS IS SHOUNEN-AI. Angst, yes but still two guys. If that kind of stuff isn't your thing, LEAVE NOW. I gave this a T rating to be careful, I don't know if it deserves more but definitely not less.

Disclamer: Kishimoto-sensei owns Naruto, not me. Mizuki and Iruka are both his dammit.

Warnings: Angst, violence, character death, shounen-ai.

Have fun!

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"Mizuki, you have to stop this! Remember the Will of Fire! Remember your comrades in the Leaf Village!" Fending off kunai, Iruka called out to his once best friend time and time again, begging him to remember the friendship they once shared. Friendship… and so much more. It had only been a short time when they were teenagers, but Iruka and Mizuki had shared a special bond. Night after night spent in each other's arms, forced to hide their relationship from those around them. But somewhere along the line, Mizuki had changed. The fun-loving boy Iruka had fallen in love with was replaced by a hardened, callous man who cared nothing for his friends and worse… nothing for Iruka.

"Comrades? How I hate that word! Power is all that matters! That, and how many enemies you can _KILL!_" Iruka just shook his head in disappointment and began forming the hand signs for another substitution jutsu. A kunai made a dull thud as it embedded itself in his back and for a moment Mizuki smiled in triumph. That smile changed to an angry glare as Iruka's body disappeared in yet another puff of smoke and a log replaced him. Mizuki cursed at his stupidity in not noticing that Iruka was a fake, then turned his attention back to his surroundings. The sound of a kunai ricocheting off a bamboo stalk made him smirk.

"Didn't I tell you, Iruka? In a bamboo grove like this there's no way you can tell where your kunai will go. An up front attack is much better!" Iruka gasped as Mizuki shot up from the ground underneath him, but as he tried to form the signs for the substitution again Mizuki grabbed his wrists and pushed him down to the ground violently. A spark of excitement made itself known in Iruka's body at being under Mizuki once again. He'd always been rough, even when they made love. The only thing that set that aside from the situation now was the look in his eyes. Even when he was inflicting pain on Iruka during their love-making sessions there'd been kindness in his eyes, a look of love and trust. Now there was only hatred and a lust to kill.

"Stop this, please… Mizuki… what happened to you? What happened to the love you had for our village… and for me? We were so close… inseparable!" A single tear escaped Iruka's eye and traveled slowly down his cheek and Mizuki gently licked it off. Iruka gasped at the intimate gesture and looked up at Mizuki with hope. But the look in his eyes hadn't changed. Except… there was something new there after all, a familiar gleam that sent chills down Iruka's back. That same gleam had been there every time his lover had looked at him in public, seeming to inform him of exactly what would happen the next time they were alone. And Mizuki hadn't cared if they were alone in a public place like a bathroom, or if it was in the privacy of the home they'd shared. He'd never turned down an opportunity to give Iruka's ass a good screwing. That look awoke a hunger inside Iruka, a need to feel his lover inside him once again. But then Mizuki spoke and his words cut straight to Iruka's heart. Deeper than any knife ever could, they opened wounds that had only just healed.

"You never meant anything to me." After the initial pang of sadness hit him, Iruka was overpowered by anger. That anger gave him the strength to break free of Mizuki's hold and he threw Mizuki off of him, jumping back and pulling out a kunai. The tears that had been threatening to overflow finally did, streaming down his face and blurring his vision. Frustrated, he wiped away the tears in time to see Mizuki charging at him, kunai in hand. It was far too late for a substitution, so Iruka braced himself for impact.

The kunai dug into his stomach, tearing through skin and muscle deep into his organs. He fell to his knees, blood trickling from the corner of his mouth. Looking up at the man who killed him, he smiled in contentment.

"If I had to die… I wanted it to be by the hands of the one I loved…" The other gasped, staring down at the man he had loved so deeply to the end. He sank to his knees as well, tears overcoming him. The man in front of him tried to smile but was overtaken by a fit of coughs as blood spattered on the ground between them. "You still are… so weak. Crying over someone like me… I chose this death. Let me go now in peace." Iruka nodded. Satisfied, Mizuki closed his eyes for the last time and fell forward into the arms of his lover and killer.

* * *

Iruka walked through the gates of the Leaf Village, carrying Mizuki's lifeless body in his arms. The tears still streamed down his face, though he no longer felt any pain or sorrow. Now he felt nothing, only a great emptiness where his love had once been. A few of the Leaf Village's inhabitants watched silently from the side of the road as he strode towards the Hokage. Tsunade watched silently as Iruka laid Mizuki's body on the ground in front of her and backed away, refusing to look her in the eye. He turned and began to walk away.

"Iruka!" At his name he turned back to Tsunade, still refusing to meet her gaze. She walked up to him and gently laid a hand on his shoulder. Slowly he wiped the tears from his eyes and looked up at her, surprised to see a look of compassion for him in her eyes. "I'm sorry. I know what it's like to lose a loved one. Take a few days off, Iruka. There are plenty of capable shinobi here to take care of your missions." Iruka smiled in appreciation and the tears returned once again.

"Thank you, Lady Hokage." Iruka formed a few hand signs and vanished. Tsunade looked after him worriedly, remembering how she had felt when she had lost first her brother, then her lover later on. It had felt like the whole world had ended. The only thing that had seemed to her to be left was for her to join them. If Shizune hadn't been there to stop her, she would have taken her own life. Tsunade stopped in her tracks. Turning to Shizune, she ordered a squad of shinobi sent to Iruka's apartment.

"And HURRY!" Shizune nodded and vanished.

* * *

Kakashi burst into Iruka's apartment far ahead of the other members of his squad. He called Iruka's name repeatedly, but got no answer. Not in the kitchen… not in the living room… Panting, he ran to the bedroom and stopped in the door, unable to believe his eyes. Iruka was sprawled out on the bed, surrounded by bloodstained sheets. A bloody kunai lay on the floor near the door and a trail of blood lead from it to the bed. A strangled cry escaped from Kakashi's throat and he flung himself at the bed, desperate to find some trace of life in Iruka. Ugly red cuts lined his arms, crisscrossed by old scars. Kakashi cursed himself for not seeing this coming. He'd known for a long time about Iruka and Mizuki, but he had kept quiet about it for their sake. When Mizuki had betrayed them all, Kakashi had kept a close eye on him and, despite Iruka's best efforts to hide them, he had caught the marks on his arms and legs during a trip to an onsen. Iruka had refused to get in the bath and Kakashi and Jiraiya had forcefully stripped Iruka and pushed him in it. It was then that Kakashi had noticed the ugly red lines running across his arms. Later, when the others were in bed, he'd confronted Iruka about it and he'd learned the whole story. Then and there Kakashi had confessed to Iruka that he'd loved him all along but Iruka had sad no, saying that he still loved Mizuki and could never betray him with another man.

Shizune ran to the side of the bed and gasped at the sight in front of her. A distraught Kakashi lay crying on the bloody body of Iruka. Quickly she began to examine him, but was stopped by a hand on her arm. Kakashi's voice rasped out a request that Shizune was forced to lean in closer to hear.

"Please… save him…" She nodded and began to work. Using her chakra, she examined every inch of his body. Finally, she found a small trace of his life force left and began to work, healing the cuts on his arms first, then drawing that trace of life force to his heart to get it beating again. No matter how hard she tried, Iruka's heartbeat wouldn't even out. Frustrated, she had nearly given up when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Tsunade motioned to her to step aside and she took over. Shizune watched anxiously as Tsunade pushed her own strength into Iruka's body, fearing the effect the massive amounts of blood would have on her.

Wiping the blood off of her hands with a towel, Tsunade looked over at the sleeping Shizune. When Shizune met her gaze she smiled, and Shizune let out a sigh of relief.

"He's going to be okay."

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Yay... It's over. Glad I got that out of my system... Hope you liked it. For anyone who liked it enough to want more I am writing it but it won't be posted on here. I will most likely post it on MediaMiner, definitely AarinFantasy. Now... go review! 


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